It's birds vs planes at the Centre County Airport and the birds lose. This explains the situation much better than I could. Consider that the airport doesn't even have a control tower. Maybe instead of whacking the birds off they should teach them how to run the airport instead. Granted they would build the control tower out of sticks and such. And the first strong wind, down it goes...but they could just rebuild....rebuild...rebuild (it'll keep them away from the planes). An eagle could be the official spokesbird (since they're so majestic). Get a couple of bluejays to help keep the employees in line and watching over them could be the turkey vultures. Since everything means lunch to them. This might solve their bird-brained scheme.
Or better yet, get the guy with the gun that shoots blanks in State College. He has been trying to ask the crows nicely at Penn State to move on out. Maybe they could work a deal out with the airport birds too and get Hitchcock to offer THE BIRDS a movie role. Or better yet get Heckle and Jeckle (they could be in customer service), Woody Woodpecker, Tweetie Bird (a trouble maker that one and would get the union all worked up I bet), the Road Runner (when Wylie E Coyote wasn't chasing him) and Foghorn Leghorn (to deal with the federal government) to come out of retirement to talk some sense into these feather brained terrorists whose grand scheme is to pick us off, one by one.
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